Tuesday 12 February 2019

Bottoms up!

Do you know who I'd really like a night-out with?

Yes, Panorama/Newsnight star reporter John Sweeney.

He sounds great fun.

I'd specifically like to be his all-expenses-paid-for guest. Especially given that I'm a tightfisted white Northern working class bloke who literally likes to eat BBC journalists for breakfast.

Yes, yes, I know it's wrong to live it up at BBC licence-fee payers' expense, but as most people hereabouts say that they don't pay the licence fee I'm sure that they (you?) will forgive me if ever Big Freelance John Sweeney of the BBC invites me to share some champagne, double gin, lots of bottles of red wine, brandy, a few lemoncellos [or is that lemoncelli?], a glass or two of Creme de Cassis, and oodles and oodles of Kir royale - particularly if it's at the expense of those daft BBC-licence-fee-paying suckers.

The following video (if it doesn't get deleted) is an absolute delight. 

Yes, its voyeuristic, and I must admit that I'm not wholly adverse to seeing BBC star reporter John Sweeney getting tipsy and slurring his words as he spreads his peacock's tail to impress a woman.

There but for the grace of God, etc...

But seriously, this must be excruciatingly embarrassing for him.

And just as much for the BBC.

For yes:

Shamelessly, and knowingly, flaunting a sense of wild f***-it abandon regarding BBC expenses by going massively OTT on buying lots of pricey alcoholic drinks at licence-fee payers' expense probably isn't a good look.

Though, of course, he may have had a biased political ulterior motive behind that spreading of his boozy, pricey peacock's tail to that particular lady.

(Hmm, what could that possibly be for his 'Tommy Takedown' programme? Scratches head, like Nigel Bruce's Dr Watson? Where's Sherlock Holmes when you need him? Holmes? Holmes?)

But if everyone's a raving alcoholic like me, the nation will forgive John and keep on paying the licence fee. We alcoholics will forgive anything.

Anyhow, here's the video (and it features some another bloke as well. You may have heard of him):


And, just in case the video does get sent down the memory hole, here's a transcript of what John Sweeney said:
...which is the Champagne and the double gin. And then we're going to have some red wine - but we can panic about that at the appropriate moment!
Here I am on expenses in the boozer, with a dog and a fire... 
I think we should have one more bottle of wine. 
F*ck it. No expense spared! Two brandies, two lemoncellos. 
Urm. this is Creme de Cassis. Er, urm, the Kir royale. Even better is another version which is, urm, er, blackberry. Blackberrent (sic, hic) liqueur and Champagne. Kir royale. How you got any flaming Sambuca? And then two Kir royale. And then the bill. 
Lovely, thank you. Er, thank you very much. 
Er, I think we gotta do a runner. 
Er, it's a joke. It's fine. I don't care. Not only, I really don't care. 
Erm, is service included? So make it £220.   


  1. Pink Floyd song about the Sun newspaper's contempt for the truth
    Does it apply to 2019 BBC

    *Not now John *
    We've got to get on with the film show
    Hollywood waits at the end of the rainbow
    Who cares what it's about
    As long as the kids go?
    Not now John we've
    Got to get on with the show
    Hang on John I've got to get on with this
    I don't know what it is
    But it fits on here like
    Come at the end of the shift
    We'll go and get pissed
    Not now John
    I've got to get on with this

    Make 'em laugh, Make 'em cry
    Make 'em dance in the aisles
    Make 'em pay, Make 'em stay
    Make 'em feel okay

  2. Amazing - still nothing on Guido even! So we can safely assign that website to the MSM.

    This is absolutely classic stuff that would normally appeal to The Sun, Mail, Telegraph and several other media outlets.

    And where are our MPs why has not a single MP followed this up with a comment?

  3. Wonder what's in the last excerpt? Saving the best for last??

  4. The BBC having up to now devoted probably tens of thousands of hours to Brexit reporting, seems not at all interested in the revelation from Olly Robbins's very own smirking lips that the fix is in and MPs will be offered a choice between May's Abject Surrender and a 21 month postponement of Brexit. Either way the EU wins.

    BBC interested? It seems not. Clearly it has been concluded the public need a pad of chloroform held firmly over the face. So we get nonsense stories about El Chapo as though that will have in the slightest effect on the drugs trade to send us to sleep.

    1. Sorry - meant for Open Thread.

  5. Don’t normally like the man, but that was a good video.


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