"Grow up. Couples row"

So, Boris and Carrie's neighbours called the police, made a recording of a private domestic row, contacted the Guardian and then handed the recording to the paper. And now it's the nation's top news story.

As ex-BBC reporter Giles Dilnot tweeted, "The idea Tony and Cherie, Norma and John, Dennis and Margaret, Samantha and David, Sarah and Gordon, Philip and “Trixy” didn’t ever have a row, yes a proper bust up, is so ridiculous that if you think it, you should go back to bed until you wake up normal".