I'll be in Morecambe afore ye

High Road and Low Road.

With reference to Craig’s eulogy to Morecambe, (wine, women and song and a fantasy about Rob Burley) I see both Guido and Steerpike have done what 'the left' are wont to do, i.e., make a mountain out of a relatively small “gotcha”.  

I’m talking about “lynch-gate”, a case which I think Rob Burley has, somewhat undeservedly, lost. (in the court of Her Majesty’s disloyal Twittersphere.) 

No. John McDonnell, odious as he is, didn’t “threaten to hang Esther McVey”.

Yes, I do think John McDonnell should have apologised, if only on behalf of the person who originally made the offending remark, but I doubt whether Andrew Marr would have extricated an apology from John McDonnell for “lynch-gate”, either way, clip or no clip. The laughter on the recording came from the auditorium and, in my humble opinion, listening again wouldn’t settle the matter definitively. Was McDonnell approving or disapproving? Was he sniggering along? Anyone video it?

In general, people are apologising for saying things that, if the world hadn’t gone bonkers, they shouldn’t really have to. The ‘right’ should stop behaving like the ‘left’, or to coin a phrase, when the left go low the right should go high. By pouncing on this modest “gotcha” and acting rather disingenuously as if it was much more serious than it really is, Guido and Steerpike are behaving  like a bunch of lefties. So, the verdict is: John McDonnell should indeed say sorry, but Andrew Marr needn’t.

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It’s a funny business, this apology malarky. 

On our local Sunday Politics a very contrite Anne-Marie Morris MP had been made to apologise profusely and most humbly for being racist. In the context she used it,  the phrase (nigger in the woodpile) was much more of a gaffe than an intentionally racist remark but she was “made to rethink”. She’s washed her mouth out with mustard and will be good from now on.

And it’s hard to tell how sincere an apology is. Look at Naz Shah. It seemed heartfelt at the time, then she went and spoiled it all by saying something stupid, like, I don’t know, practically everything.

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Interview about the Ginger Pay Gap

Concerning the topical matter of hair. and the fuss about Prince William’s £180 Grade One, which has miraculously turned him into Stephen Kinnock. 

People are scratching their heads over how a simple head-shave could cost that much. Must be the overheads. Anyway, I wondered if Jo Coburn’s hairdresser charges much for gradually nudging her hairdo away from the slightly  powdered-wig effect towards new, shinier, Television Hair?

Are you saying that all wimmin must ….?

No, but, I prefer…. 

That’s a bit divisive isn’t it?

Well, Caitlin Moran isn’t on view very often, and her matted locks don’t look very nice. It’s like, radio hair.

So you’re saying that people with ginger hair should be discriminated against?

No, Caitlin Moran doesn’t even have ginger hair as far as I can tell but I prefer hair not to look stiff.

That sounds discriminatory. Doesn’t it bother you that you’re drawing attention to a physical disability attribute?

Yes, but it was Ms. Moran herself who drew attention to her barnet in last Sunday’s paper (£) 

“Caitlin Moran: why I love big hair” Hers is big because she back-combs it mercilessly, obviously. She sees it as a statement because she believes giant hair gives the ambitious working-class woman substance and presence. Weaponising huge hair is not new. Malia Bouattia, Mona Chalabi and Ahed Tamimi  for example. And that channel 4 anchor person. Why else would Rachel Johnson and Claudia Winkleman sport below-the-eye length fringes to peer out of? Why indeed, but has famous red-head Mary Portarse  been held back by her hair? Non! Not in the least.

You think—— hang on, let me get that straight — straight means, what?

Straightened, probably. Ann Widdecombe has been at the tongs,  which clearly demonstrates something.

Are you in favour of equal pay for equal hair?

This is largely Donald Trump’s fault, and Boris Johnson’s. I don’t actually care about the ginger pay gap. Or Frankie Boyle.

What gives you the right to take that view?

Because this is the only website on the entire interweb that hasn’t blogged that interview. Police protection applied for.

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The Big Questions was fun. They had a discussion about Trump. Roughly three and a half people supported Trump’s achievements (if not his personality) in the face of about seventy people who thought Trump was a racist and a lunatic. However, the former were more effective speakers than the latter, which evened up the score somewhat.  The worst case of hypocrisy came from Nicky Campbell himself.

After his anti-Trump rant had been rather forcefully debunked by the aforementioned three and a half, he said plaintively  “I’m only asking the questions!” 

If only.