Thursday, 25 April 2019

Thursday Night Quiz


For those who want a quiz and some jokes tonight, BBC favourite Ash Sarkar has tweeted a couple of rib-tickling Islamophobic quips this evening (ambulances required lest sides literally split), and I've been inspired by R Ash to match her - beautifully-sculpted communist finger nail to shabby reactionary running-dog capitalist lickspittle finger nail (so to speak) - with two hot-off-the-presses jokes of my very own. 

So ITBB's quiz tonight is to see if you can guess which two are Ash's jokes and which two are mine. (Warning: I may not come off better):
  1. What do you call a halal menu? Allah carte.
  2. “Waiter, why is my dessert just the Quran served with a dollop of ice cream? Because you ordered Allah mode.”
  3. What is the favourite French novel for Muslims nostalgic for the Caliphate? Proust's 'Allah recherche du temps perdu'.
  4. What did Turkey's Recep Tayyip Erdo─čan name as his favourite piece by Mozart? The finale of the Piano Sonata No. 11 in A major, K311, the 'Rondo Allah Turca'. 
A final quip beginning "What almost-rhyming Muslim cry provokes panic in most snack bars?" has been banned by Facebook, Twitter and the BBC. 

3 comments:

  1. OK it's a bit of a toughie... but I am going with 3 and 4 as Ash's because they are a little bit (tip of the finger nail) edgy without being potentially offensive to Islam (sorry about that Craig, I would have preferred to have found Ash as being offensive to Islam).

    It's not surprising given she self-describes not only as ("literally" - as though she's ever read Das Kapital Vol 2 like me!!)a Communist but also a (literal) Muslim.

    Let's face it - absurd as she is - Ash is at the v. epicentre of the Zeitgeist! :) Gawd bless 'er. :)

    Which doesn't mean she won't find herself condemned by some future "People's Tribunal" that finds her guilty "bourgeois decadence and use of Vietnamese slave labour services to adorn her finger nails") and sentences her to 10 years' hard labour .

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    1. It's the other way round. 3 and 4 are mine. :)

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    2. Oh well, you're safe! lol She is literally a Communist then...fair dos.

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