Sunday 26 July 2015

"Abdul’s eyes glint like a tiger in the Arabian desert"



Talking about Peter Oborne...(were we?)...


Peter Oborne's Guardian article takes the form of what Sarah describes as "a fawning interview with Abdul Wahid, the head of Hizb ut-Tahrir in Britain". She rightly calls the piece "appalling".

The Guardian's commentariat don't seem very taken with it either, if all the top-rated comments are anything to go by.

Anyhow, here's a brief taste of King of Dawah's parody:
Walking in Ealing on a summers day on the way to conduct this interview I was reminded of the time I hit a six in Somerset whilst playing for the Old Colonials XI. The ball landed plum on Montague’s left eye, leaving it as ripe as a mango from the plains  of Punjab.  
I recount this tale because the man I am interviewing, Abdul Khalifa , an old friend of mine, often serves mango after dinner. His wife cooked quail biryani, the rice plaited with raisins marinaded in Grantchester cranberry wax. I’ve been friends with Abdul since we worked together on a TV documentary about why Britain is an evil, Weimar Germany era type society run by cabals of nefarious corrupt scumbags who eat Muslim babies for breakfast. Of late, it has been suggested that the organisation he is leader of, ‘Caliphate-über-Alles', is extremist.   
I put the question to him, and he is bemused. 
“I find it very curious that we are described as extremist when Western society is itself full of the extremist ideology of liberalism, happiness, and secularism.” 
“Crikey,” I say, unnerved by the fearless anti-establishment analysis he presents.

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